Goop.

This is what Tagen looked like when she woke up this morning...

Goop.

Big eye goop... In. Both. Eyes.

Seriously?

This is her after I washed them out and put on the medication from the LAST TIME she had pink eye.

Can this kid get a break from illness?

PLEASE?

Good news is... She can't really give it to Olivia because Olivia also has it... in both eyes.

(Just not as bad as Tagen.)

Even Better news... We had her White Blood Count done yesterday. The count is at 1400!

She's climbing. Normal range is 1500 - 8000. We'll do another one in two weeks.

So... Don't come to the Morris household. We're contagious.

I'm also scrubbing my house from top to bottom with every kind of cleaner I can find.

Or should I just fumigate the house?

Signs of Spring!!

When I saw this bee, this is all I could think of...

"Tower, this is Ghost Rider requesting a flyby."

"That's a negative, Ghost Rider, the pattern is full."

Olivia is ecstatic about Spring! She's loving all the outdoor time!

I am loving spring also. Its been a long time coming for me.

I love all the beauty and beautiful smells that are surrounding us.

I hope they last for a little while before the heat of summer takes over.

PCMC

Many of you know, (via facebook and friends), that we spent part of our weekend at PCMC with our little Tagen.

Here is a recap of what happened over the last week so you know why.

On Sunday night, Tagen started to get what I initially thought was a diaper rash. It was red and warm. She's had many of them before, so I didn't think a whole lot about it at first. Then on Monday I noticed she had developed what looked like a pimple on her "lady parts" down in her diaper area. For a couple days is looked like a pimple while the area surrounding it continued to get redder, hotter and more swollen. She woke up from her nap with a fever of 103.2 and I realized this wasn't a diaper rash. I noticed she also had cold symptoms so I thought we were having a recurrence of her Adenovirus and maybe that was causing the high fevers. (Kids really should come with instruction manuals.) On Wednesday the "pimple" turned purple and nasty looking. We took her to the doctor and he swabbed it for a culture. He also treated Olivia for pink eye. Nice to "kill two birds with one stone."

He put her on Augmentin and said to watch it. If it continued to get worse, I was to bring her back in on Friday. The fevers of 103 degrees or higher continued and the sore turned white and looked REALLY infected. So... on Friday, I took her back in. Her doctor sent us right up to PCMC ER with a warning that we might be admitted. Her cultures that he took were growing Pseudomonas and many other nasty things. He was worried that she was going to also grow MRSA. MRSA is Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA). It is a bacterial infection that is highly resistant to some antibiotics.

Brad left work and met me at home. Olivia was at RaShawn's house having the time of her life. Brad and I drove up to the ER and they were waiting for us. We got right in and they started doing more tests. It took FOREVER to get an IV on Tagen. She was really dehydrated and she has tiny veins. They had to stick her 3 times before they finally got a good IV in her foot. The doctor did what is called a conscious sedation. They gave her Ketamine, a drug that will make her not remember any of the procedure even though she looked like she was awake. Once that had taken effect, they lanced her sore trying to get out the infection. Nothing came out. We were really surprised and so were the doctors. They gave her IV antibiotics and admitted her for 24 - 36 hours. We were taken to a room where we would be staying. Brad stayed until about 9:00 that night then he left to go home and take care of Olivia. I slept on the "bed" they provide for parents. Tagen has been so traumatized by her recent visits to the doctor and to PCMC that every time someone wearing scrubs walked in the room she started crying. But, we had fantastic nurses and techs and they treated us great. She did remarkable with the medication. I was surprised on Saturday morning when I changed her diaper. There was so much improvement. So much so, that she got to come home after 27 hours of being in the hospital. Things are looking MUCH better. She's not completely better, but improving.

The other scary thing that was happening that we were told about, but didn't really realize quite the magnitude of how serious it could be was that her white blood cells are REALLY low. (The doctors really downplayed their worry while explaining it all to us.) While in the hospital her neutrophils (white blood cells) went from 900 to 500 to 100. Normal range is 1500 - 8000. They tested her for leukemia and other types of cancer!!! Thank goodness the oncologist said she doesn't have cancer. WHeW!!! They think the low number might be a reaction to the antibiotics. We will go back in a week to have more blood drawn and see if they are still low or not. We're praying for a good outcome with those tests.

We are so grateful for the blessings we have and the miracles that we've witnessed. We're grateful to Bishop and Brother Moffet for coming to the ER and giving Tagen a blessing. We are thankful for family and friends who were willing to take care of Olivia while we were at the hospital. I know we are truly blessed to be able to bring Tagen home and to have her recovering so quickly.

This is right after we got to the ER. Poor little sickie.

Tagen hooked up to all the machines and me trying to entertain her.

The nurse gave her this little bear and she wouldn't let go of it.

She FINALLY got a little bit of sleep while we were waiting.

Right after the procedure and her coming out of her sedation.

Still coming out of her sedation. There was something very interesting above her that we couldn't see. She kept pointing to it.

She just looks miserable, right?

Her "attachments." EKG wires, blood pressure cuff and IV tubing.

It was reassuring to hear the beeps and to be able to read her monitor.

Thank goodness for paramedic school.

Getting settled in her room. She wasn't sure about the new digs...

Enjoying some cuddle time with daddy.

This was her breakfast Saturday morning.

I couldn't believe the difference in her appearance... and her appetite!

Our "grand suite."

This is while we were waiting to be discharged.

She was playing with Brad and emptying the box of tissues.

Identity Crisis

I have thought so much about WHO I am lately. What is my identity? Where do I get it from? As I look at my postings on my blog, I realized that it is almost ALL about my two kids. I started wondering.... Do I have a life of my own now that I'm a mom? Is this what my world consists of? My two kids? Is that all I can find to blog about? I'm sure people get tired of reading about my two completely adorable and beautiful kids all the time, right? Well, maybe.

I started thinking about all that I have done in my life that has given me an identity. I have been know as many things... A waitress. A lumber yard store clerk. A school newspaper editor. A gas station attendant. A Bishop's daughter...(not that kind of Bishop's daughter.) A Sister. A Daughter. A Friend. A dancing partner. An Aggie. An Institute Council Member. An EFY Counselor. Brad's wife. Olivia and Tagen's mom. A Firefighter/Paramedic. And now, a Stay At Home Mom. I have gotten different levels of pleasure from each title. I used to get the most pride from the title of Firefighter/Paramedic. There is just something so cool about being a female and being able to say, "Yes. I'm a firefighter." Or, "No, those firefighter license plates are MINE. Not my husband's." I will admit it... Prideful? YES. But I LOVED being able to claim that title. When I quit working to stay at home, and earned a new title... SAHM, I often wondered if I'd ever "be cool" again. Would I ever be able to say, "Yes, I am a .........................." and feel so awesome again? Whatever the job title would be.

(One of my first gigs as a firefighter. I love this photo.)

Then a couple months ago while in an interview with our Stake President,

he asked a couple simple questions that really put me in my spot. He truly humbled me. He reminded me that...

"My job is what I do. It's not WHO I am. I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father. That's where my worth comes from.

Not from being a firefighter, but from being HIS daughter."

I sat there and thought about his insight. I've thought about it many times since. My identity and self worth should come from the knowledge of having a Divine Birthright. Not from a really cool job that I once had. Then I realized I still have a really cool job. Yes, there are no recognitions and red lights and sirens with my current job that there were with the last. But, there is a loving Heavenly Father and two very beautiful daughters that recognize what I'm doing each day. I'm doing what He asked me to do, and I'm serving where I'm needed. Does it get hard? Yes. Does it feel the same each day? Yes. Am I doing something for my children that only I can do? YES. Am I the best mom for my kids? I'm trying.

I know I've posted similar thoughts here before, but it seems like I need a reminder every so often of what is truly important in life. Humility is a hard thing to hold on to. I'm grateful that for now, my identity crisis is over and that I've once again learned WHO I am. I hope I never forget.

Birthday Princess!

My darling Olivia turned 4 today! I can't believe how fast the time has gone by. We decided to let her have her first "friend party" to celebrate. She had a complete blast and hasn't stopped talking about it yet. Here are some pictures of her day.

I painted our front walk for her last night.

She was so surprised this morning when she looked out and saw it.

We played a mean game of "Button, Button, who has the Button?"

Because it was a princess party, there was a need to read a princess story.

Cinderella filled the spot quite nicely.

Here are the girls decorating their princess crowns.

Such a cute bunch, eh?

Tagen was a dream during the party.

Lots of quietly watching and enjoying all that happened.

Olivia LOVED all of her presents.

This face was made during the opening of each one.

She got SPOILED.

Lots of hugs were shared with everyone.

Of course, there had to be candles blown out

and the ritual "Happy Birthday" sung.

I laughed when I saw this. The girls wanted to do "Cheers."

I don't know who thought of it, but they loved it.

(No lemonade was spilled in the making of this picture...)

Here are the party goers. I told them to smile pretty.

Here's what a great party and some sugar will

do to the same princesses moments later.

Too Funny.

Happy Birthday Munchkin!

I hope you know how much we love you.

Thanks for being you.

I LOVE YOU!

Wowzers!!!

Last week I received an email from my sister-in-law, Trish. She suggested I enter a photography contest.

I figured, "Okay, why not?" The winner receives a REALLY COOL camera bag by Jo Tote. So, I entered and ....

http://www.cjaneprovo.com/2010/04/jo-tote-for-carrie-from-guest-judge.html

Thank you Trish!

I'm humbled.

Done!

(Doesn't this picture just make you want to kiss those cheeks!?)

Guess who is FINALLY weaned!?

I'm a "free woman" again after almost 14 months!

I love her so much and I'm so grateful I've been able to nurse my children,

BUT...

I'M. SO. EXCITED.

Yahoo!!!